The countdown to the Holidays starts earlier and earlier these days. Don’t be surprised this year if, the day after Christmas, you see a sign in a store window: Only 364 shopping days left!
This month, however, would be a good time to start shopping. As a public service, I’ve compiled a helpful list of ideas so you can get your head into the game.
If you have a horse lover or ten on your gift list, lucky you. No, really. We’re the easiest people to buy for. Just get us something that has a horse on it, or is used on a horse, and we’re happy.
So for horse owners, horse lovers, and those who give gifts to them, I present the Equine Winter Holiday Shopping Calendar.

Day One
Start off small: a hoof pick. After all, it’s the perfect gift; in the winter, who doesn’t want an implement made of cold steel for picking packed snow out of Brownie’s hooves? It will definitely get your recipient in the Christmas spirit. I did a little research to see the range of hoof picks available to choose from, and found an interesting item online: a nice, sturdy looking pick with an ergonomically designed plastic handle. Underneath, here’s the sales copy: “Easier combing with fewer tangles in a convenient pocket size with easy care hole hangers.” Hmmm. I wasn’t aware I needed to comb my horse’s hooves. Am I confused, or was the copywriter?

Day Two
Alternating with something practical from day one, you’ll want to focus on something fun. And what’s more fun (but still not over the top) than cutesy boot socks? Boot socks are one way that hunter riders can express their individuality, underneath their staid navy coats and buff breeches. Pull off those field boots and take a walk on the wild side! Now, the wild side ranges from camo to classic argyle to artist-signed hand-silk-screened versions about which it’s claimed, “You will feel guilty wanting to cover them with your boots.” Actually, I’d feel guilty wearing signed art on my stinky feet, but that’s another matter.

Day Three
Back to practicality with fancy grooming tools. If you have not diligently shopped for grooming supplies recently, you have no idea of the wide range of currying, bushing, combing, detangling, pulling, shedding thingys available to care for your horse. You might still be using one implement for one task, such as a brush to brush the horse and a sponge to sponge him off. Ah, no! Nowadays, what’s quite popular are the two in one hybrid items like the “sponge brush.” What, its makers ask, could be more clever than a sponge and a brush all in the same tool? What indeed? Maybe the aluminum pulling comb with a handle that doubles as a hoofpick! What will they think of next?! If it’s not dual-function, it’s high-fashion, such as scrubbers “made of a cool glittery jelly material.” But the Swiss Army Knife of grooming tools has to be the Tomahawk Brush, which appears to be a utility tool with a round curry comb on one side of its handle, a brush on the other, and two tomahawk-like side wings that seem to contain a comb on one wing and a rubber squeegee on the other. No, I’m not kidding. Look it up.

Day Four
Grooming takes a lot of time, so for day four, help your equestrian speed up her chores by giving her a horsey vacuum to help. Less time grooming, more time riding. And as if sucking away all that pesky loose hair isn’t enough, the vacs have health claims as well. One not only cleans but “aerates” your horse’s coat. There are also the wet-vac options, to both scrub your horse and vacuum the dirty water away. Of course, allow for added time to get your mount sacked out to the vac – which should take somewhere between a couple of months and forever.

Day Five
Back to the fun items. As regular readers of the “Last Laugh” know, I have a fascination with the crystal craze sweeping horse and rider gear. So I decided to find as many crystal-encrusted objects as possible for your gift-giving needs.
For your English rider, I recommend stirrup irons inlaid with Swarovski crystals. If you’re understated or broke, go for the stirrups with one sparkly crystal set into each side. If you want to go all out, or blind the judge every time he checks your feet, up the ante to the 22-crystal version. Although, if your heels are down where they ought to be, remember that while you’re paying for 22, you’re really only getting 12 crystals’ worth of bling for your bucks.
You can also add a jeweled stirrup keeper to keep your stirrup crystals in proper viewing position when your saddle is in the tack room, or you’re lunging your horse. On a sunny day this can create a nice disco mirror ball effect as the sun bounces off your irons.
Pull the whole look together with the sensational crystal-ized spurs, AND crystal-accented snaffle bit. Your horse will appreciate the thought. If you’re going to give him a little extra poke in the side and contact with the reins, at least do it with glitz. And we’re not done yet! For day six we have…

Day Six
…a crystal-lined browband to match the stirrups. You can go with a simple row of sparkles, but to really get attention, have rhinestone-studded letters and charms affixed to the noble mount’s browband. You can spell out the horse’s name, T-H-U-M-B-E-L-I-N-A, for example, or a message you want everyone to see in sparkly, flashing glory, such as F-O-R S-A-L-E C-H-E-A-P.

Day Seven
Not to leave out the western riders, today you get your own crystal-studded stirrups. Silver-plated floral swirls accented with, not two, not 22, but 80 stunning Swarovski crystals! There are forty per stirrup, because the surface to be covered is so much greater. The western rider’s mantra used to be, if it goes on the horse, plate it with silver. In the 21st century, silver is simply not flashy enough. Crystal-ize everything! Which leads us to…

Day Eight
The crystallized western bridle-and-breastcollar set with the crystals set onto cowhide accents. I like the contrast, personally. Cowhide…crystals. It certainly says your rider is a little bit country, a little bit rock and roll. You can get a belt to match, naturally. Heck, you can get a saddle to match too.

Day Nine
Whew! The gift-hiding place in your house is probably getting rather crowded now. Let’s look for some smaller pieces. How about jewelry – you can never go wrong with that. Of course, the horse head necklaces and bit bracelets are ever popular. There are leather versions and ones made of horsehair. But if you want to really show off, I found a vintage horseshoe nail bracelet made by…Gucci. Well, Hermes makes saddles, so why not.

Day Ten
For day 10, let’s go back to the practical. Your rider needs to carry all this gear. For that, there’s something called “equestrian luggage.” You might have formerly known this as hat boxes and bridle bags, but get with the program. Of course there are hat bags, saddle bags, bridle bags and coat bags. But there are also gear/duffle bags big enough to carry five Jack Russels or a mini-horse. There are double decker western hat carriers, as well as ones that carry your cowboy hat and boots plus belt and World Show buckle. There are so many pieces of luggage available that you’ll need another horse to haul them all.

Day Eleven
Today, let’s focus on apparel for the rider. Show you’re sensitive to your carbon footprint by getting the eco-friendly new clothing pieces such as the items made of recycled yarn bits. One such maker modestly notes that using recycled yarn saves the equivalent of a quarter of a gallon of gasoline per yard of fabric. Which is about what it takes to drive your truck over to your trailer to hitch it up. Only in America can spending money on a riding vest equal saving gasoline.
You can also get your show rider a new outfit. For hunter riders, be extravagant – find a different shade of navy jacket. Ok, what can I tell you? That’s why I made such a big deal about the boot socks.
For western riders, for heaven’s sake, give her some chaps in another color besides black. Black chaps are to western pleasure what the navy coat is to the hunter ring. Live a little. Better yet, take up a rodeo event; you have even more leeway in clothing choices, and if you’re good, some big company will sponsor you.

Day Twelve
But we haven’t addressed the endurance riders at all so far. So Day 12 is dedicated to them. Word to the wise: high visibility for when you’re riding through the wilderness and don’t want to be mistaken for a game animal. I found a super neat set of florescent yellow chaps, jacket, vest and helmet band. Not cutesy, but practical. I found nothing, however, with crystals.
Ok, endurance riders aren’t all about the clothes like the show world is. Get them cool gadgets instead, like a horse heart rate monitor and a GPS. I personally didn’t even know they make these items, but if I rode endurance, I’d rather have them than something that made me look like a radioactive egg yolk.
Take a break and balance the checkbook; next month we cover the remaining days before Christmas. Happy shopping, everyone!

Ange Dickson Finn is a freelance writer, western pleasure competitor and retired horse show mom who will gladly send you her holiday wish list. Visit her at www.theingate.com.

Be sure to check out equinejournal.com throughout the month of December for a chance to win great horsey gifts for each day of Christmas!